I have talked before about the fear that drove my success of the Medically supervised fast in 2006-2007 that resulted in my 72 pound weight loss. After I had two regurgitating days, I started to come down with a cold on Tuesday. Yup, a head filling, house rattling coughing fit and disgusting sounding nose blowing cold.
So, since I was away, I didn't do much and I came home last Friday and have been in bed for 3 full days. My mindfulness continues as my stomach as fully recovered, that is no more gurgling and I feared that I might slip back into my old ways. Evidenced by a marble cake in Carmel, CA with that gateway drug, Cappuccino. I immediately felt bad. This was an emotional "bad" not a physical "bad" and I was concerned. I think I would have preferred a bout of puking.
So the stop at TJ on the way home, to check into bed, I bought a boneless, skinless chicken breast and went to bed.
I cut off about a third, and I did not want any more. At dinner, I did the same and again, I stopped way before I was full. I am conscious of not wanting to feel full.
Without going through every meal, I want to get across that I am going to bed slightly hungry, I am eating modestly. I have gone gluten free and have rye bread that is small (very expensive) and is working as a sandwich encasing chicken, or a turkey burger.
What I am seeing is that with this mindfulness I have had a week of seeing that I really CAN exist on less, that I risk less upset both phyisically and emotionally by eating lighter. I am committed to keeping this going.
I wanted you to know that sometimes what hits you upside the head should sometimes be listened to.
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